If there's one golden rule about mentioning an ex, never do it on a first date....dont even bring her into a conversation when you two are still taking baby steps, some men just get carried away and get confused along the way with the my 'X' this, My 'X' that... what you might mean as a compliments might sound otherwise,women, do not appreciate men who talk about their previous women while they're trying to get to know,you. Personally men Who are always talking about their exes piss me off sometimes, How would you feel if I was always talking about 'My Ex'
The Views below by William Leigh..
"It's nice being with someone more relaxed about their appearance"
She does look seriously cute in loose jeans and a big baggy jumper, but what you're really saying, in her mind, is that she doesn't make an effort - and your ex did.
Unintentionally and by implication only, you've said she doesn't look as good. You might have meant it in the nicest possible way - but you'll find yourself back-tracking quickly with an 'I didn't mean it in that way...' Then you know you're in trouble.
"Oh Hannah... I mean Sarah..."
It's pretty easy to do - you call your new partner your ex's name. The problem is, more often than not, that it occurs when you're really distracted and focused on something else. Like in bed, which is never great.
You can't really talk your way out of it, so the best bet is to apologise profusely. Prevention is actually the key to this one - go out with girls with unusual, long, preferably foreign names. You won't confuse Addfwyn with Yvette now will you?
"You know what I like about you? You order your own chips"
In a roundabout way, you've just said she's fat.
You probably meant something sweet, like your ex used to not order them and then pinch all yours and isn't it nice that she doesn't do that and she's capable of admitting she loves chips and that's ok and and and...but no. Don't do it.
"My ex used to like it when I did that"
The bedroom, as well as being your friend, is also your mortal enemy. It's the primo place for making a right royal cock up. Telling her that your ex used to let you do things in a semi-whinging voice isn't going to make you any friends fast.
But it's not as bad as telling her that your ex used to like it when you did that certain something to her. Get this through your head and get it good - there shall be no mention of exes, even in passing discussion, in the bedroom, whatsoever.No ifs, no buts - just no. The bedroom is a sacrosanct place that should be shared by just the two of you.
"Kinky gets boring after a while"
What you mean: you have a more relaxed sexual relationship with her. What she hears: 'you're boring in bed'.
It's funny how it works, isn't it? How the simplest thing you say as some sort of misguided compliment can backfire hideously on you.The best advice we can give: go with the positives. Never mention what she's not, but what she is and how great that is and you'll be all smiles in no time.
"You've got a much nicer personality than her"
It's a compliment right? Wrong. Another piece of advice - if you don't need to say it, don't.
Normally, you might have thrown this one into conversation at a point when you needed to pull out all the stops - ie, you've done something horribly wrong (probably one of the previous options) and are scraping the barrel for compliments to dig yourself out of a hole. Well, don't.
In this case she's hearing: 'She was prettier than you, but you've got a much nicer personality'. Don't ask us, we don't get it either. But you said it.
So - the golden rule to success without the ex is simple - if you don't have to say it, don't! And if you do, say it with flowers. Women are sensitive about men who talk about an 'X' frequently
Thursday, November 18, 2010
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